


The Bunker

by BenevolentFae



Category: Bellarke - Fandom, The 100 (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-04-20
Updated: 2018-08-30
Packaged: 2019-07-08 00:32:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,853
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15919341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BenevolentFae/pseuds/BenevolentFae
Summary: After Clarke finds out about Raven she runs off into the woods. Bellamy catches up to her and they end up in the bunker getting hot and heavy (Smutness)





	1. Chapter 1

I wanted to hurl. Of all the people sent down from the Ark, it was Raven. Finn knew all my dirty little secrets and he hadn't even mentioned her. I'd needed to get out of there before he could see the hurt. Running blindly through the woods, eyes blurred with tears, it was as if there were no oxygen on this entire goddamn planet. This stupid place, I'd lost Wells, my mother, now Finn? I crashed into a tree, heaving and gasping and sobbing all at once. Catching the sharp snap of a twig, my head whirled. Seeing nothing, I took off again, hoping it wasn't Finn. I didn't need to hear it. Vaguely, I was aware I was being chased, not that it mattered as my limbs seemed to be moving on their own. I threw another look over my shoulder, focusing forwards a second too late.

I crashed into what was much too soft to be a tree, whatever wind I had knocked out of me. As I finally stopped, everything caught up to me and I caved, surprised arms wrapping me in a cautious embrace as I let the sobbing take over. Warm hands brushed the hair from my face, cradling me gently as we sunk to the forest floor. Keeping me tight to him until the shaking slowed, I was finally given the leeway to tilt my head up to the face above me. It took me several seconds to make sure I was seeing correctly, and I almost scoffed in his face.

"Princess..?" Bellamy worried. I tried to scramble away, but he held me tightly, demanding an answer I wasn't ready to give. He frowned as he watched my eyes begin to water again, and I hurried to wipe them away. He caught my wrist, his gaze searing down on mine, and I suddenly realized how close we were. He must have too, because he cleared his throat and let go, shifting his eyes away uncomfortably. "I saw you run off.." he muttered. I just stared at him, not sure how that explains why he came after me. He opened his mouth as if about to say more, but thought better of it, and we just sat there in silence.

"He never told me about her, and before she came back we-" I cut myself off as my throat closed up again, grateful because I never really wanted to tell him that last part anyways.

"Wait, can you be a little more - oh.. OH." as realization dawned on him. I could have sworn I'd seen the tiniest flicker of a smirk, and something else. Was that... Jealou-

"CLARKE!"

Both our heads snapped up as Finn's call echoed out around us. Bellamy's question hung in his eyes, and I just shook my head before he sprung up, reaching for my hand to drag me with him. He hesitated for a moment, not at all sure where to go. Deciding for him, I pulled him with me, running a wide breach around where Finn's voice had come from. Hoping we reached the bunker first, I picked up our pace. Breathing out a sigh of relief, I threw open the hatch and shot a look at him over my shoulder. He seemed uncertain, but as I leapt down the hole and moved for the lanterns I heard him land down behind me. After sparking up the light I quickly closed the hatch door, sliding the bar across to hold it shut. I rested my head against the wall and let out a shaky breath before turning to meet Bellamy's gaze. He didn't move, just stared at me with an intense look. I felt like a mouse in a corner, cat staring me down as the intensity builds before he pounces.

"We just found it one day." I muttered defensively.

"Why." His question sounding more like a demand as he took a slow, predatory step closer.

"If we told you this place existed, it wouldn't be sa-" I began.

"That's not what I meant." he cut me off, taking another step.

"I don-"

"Why him."

"Bellamy, that's none of your business." I choked out, angry he asked, angry it happened. He was close now, a step away. The dim lights cast a shadow to him, making me uneasy at the intensity laying beneath his stony face. I should have just left him out there, locked the hatch and drank whiskey till it didn't hurt so much. I tried to slide past him, squeezing myself between him and the wall, but his arm shot out against the wall, stopping me. Reluctantly, I turned to face him, closer than comfort allowed. My pulse raced, and as I slid my eyes from his lips back up to his eyes I tried to convince myself it was because of fear. Eyes never leaving mine, he leaned in slowly to hover his lips beside my ear.

"Forget about him." I shivered slightly as hot breath caressed my neck. My legs suddenly felt useless, and I forced myself harder into the wall to try and gain even a millimeter of distance. He pulled back, and I mentally chastised my subconscious as it whimpered in disappointment when he turned to check out the place. He walked around the room, looking at the tiny glass trinkets on the shelves, and the books, stopping at the desk to admire my drawings.

"These are remarkable" he stated.

"Thanks." I blushed slightly, kicking myself mentally again. He looked at me, as if he hadn't expected me to have drawn them, and I realized he probably hadn't. The only ones who knew I drew were... Whatever. Walking over to the mattress on the floor, I picked up the mostly full bottle of alcohol and took a long, hard swig. Plopping beside me, Bellamy reached out and I placed the drink in his hand. He took a gulp, then another before hanging it back. Laying back and folding his hands behind his head, he let out a contented sigh. I took three more big sips before replacing the lid and setting the bottle down. Not really sure what to do with myself now, I just let myself feel the buzz hit me, and the burn working it's way down my throat. He let out a throaty laugh, a deep sound that sent a tingle down my spine, before pinching my shirt and pulling me down on my back beside him. "Loosen up, Princess." he chuckled. Smiling, I gave him a playful shove.

"This is... nice, actually." I mumbled, closing my eyes.

"Mmm." he murmured lazily. It was more like a grunt, and my mind wandered sluggishly, thinking of how he might sound when h-

I sat up quickly, sliding over a little to put some distance between our legs. He curiously opened one eye to look at me, a knowing smirk on his face. Another mental berating as a blush spread across my face and down my neck, probably all the way to my toes and back up to the Ark. He sat up slowly, reaching past me for the bottle, and I squeezed my eyes shut as his arm brushed over my knee. Forcing myself to ignore the feelings, (because who wanted to get burned twice in one day?) I started to stand up. His hand clutched my arm to stop me, and it was so warm, so demanding... Wait was he talking?

"What?" I giggled.

"I said you've had more than you think, and you should probably stay down for a while." His tone half amused, half 'I said it and it's final.' Shaking my head, more to clear it than to protest, he chuckled at my furrowed brow. "You need to learn how to relax" he smirked, leaning back on one elbow.

"I'm very relaxed right now." I glared at him.

"That was convincing" I shoved him again, and this time he shoved back. It turned into a teasing war of trying to get the other off the bed. His knee brushed a sensitive spot on my ribs, and I jerked away, letting out a laugh as he raised his eyebrows. "No." I warned, but he lunged for me, tickling while I struggled to get away, batting at his hands. In the middle of begging him to stop he reached for the spot again, and reflexively I flipped over, pinning his arms down and straddling his waist as I gasped out "Please!"

We froze there, staring at each other for too long, breathing heavily. My breath hitched, and I started to apologize, releasing his arms and making to move off his lap when he grabbed my hips, holding me in place. He sat up, and I began to protest, but I was sidetracked by those lips again, so close...

"Clarke..." I started to pull away again, and he just grinned, flipping us suddenly so he was on top between my legs. Desire flashed hot through me, so strong I let out a whimper. This was not happening! He lowered his head to my neck, whispering "relax" against my ear as he went. I brought my hands up to his chest with the intention of pushing, but my fists bunched in his shirt as his tongue slid out to lap hotly at my pulse point. I let out a low moan, eyelids fluttering closed at the sensations. Slowly, he licked his way down my neck, his hands working over my waist to push my shirt up slightly. I started to lower my knees, but instead his hand came up behind my kneecaps, raising them. As my legs were spread wider he ground his hips into me, hitting just the right spot, and I gasped loudly.

"Bellamy.." I tried, shoving weakly at his chest, and he brought his lips back up to my ear.

"I love it when you say my name," He breathed hotly, "and I'm going to make you scream it, Princess." I whimpered again, trying to convince myself to stop this. Instead, my hands reached down to the edge of his shirt, pulling it up as he shifted to get it off his head. He leaned back down to kiss me, and I made a little noise as I deepened the kiss, feeling his hands tugging my shirt up. He paused to toss it away, but his lips found mine as soon as it was gone, and I arched my back up into his hot skin. He quickly unhooked my bra, following the straps down my shoulders with his mouth. He trailed a finger lightly down my cleavage, smiling against my chest as I moaned impatiently. Tossing the bra into our growing pile he leaned to admire me, eyes raking over my exposed flesh before back up to my eyes. He opened his mouth, but I pulled his head down to smother his words in a kiss. Kissing his way down, I scraped my nails down his back when his mouth finally found my nipples. Teasing each one between his lips, I threw my head back and breathed, reveling in the sensations.

"Bellamy." I gasped, pleading, digging my nails into his arms.

"Say it." he demanded, grinding his erection against my center

"I-I.. Please"

"Tell me what you want" He breathed against my neck. "Come on Princess, use your words." I felt the smirk.

"Fuck. Me." I grinded up against him. It was his turn to moan, and he threw his head back, cursing. He tugged roughly on my jeans, and I helped him work them down to my knees before he slid them off and tossed them away. Staring down at me hungrily, he lowered his head low on my stomach, breathing a hot trail downwards. His teasing was driving me insane, and I rubbed my thighs tightly together in need of some release. He reached between them and pried them apart, continuing his teasing by dragging his tongue slowly across the edge of my panties. Bellamy slid a hand down to his own pants, smoothly getting them off with ease while he supported himself above me with the other, all the while his mouth never leaving my waist. I bucked underneath him, needing... more! he dragged the last shred of clothing from my body and settled his head between my thighs. He slid his tongue slowly up my dripping slit, and I let out a low moan, clutching at his head.

"Mmmm, you taste so good" he groaned into my heat, and dived back in, tongue lapping and sucking at my clit. I felt a finger test at my entrance, and his laugh shake through my core. "So wet" he murmured, and thrust a finger inside. My hips bucked up, and Bellamy had to use his other hand to hold me down as he continued his assault. He added another finger and pumped faster, curling his fingers.

"God, Bellamy I'm -" was all I managed before my body arched and I began to clench around his hands. He continued lapping at my juices, riding out my orgasm till I pushed his head gently away. He crawled back up my body, placing kisses here and there before slanting his lips across mine. As our tongues battled for dominance, I tasted myself and moaned. I supposed I should be disgusted, but it just turned me on more. He looked me in the eyes and pleaded,

"Princess, I need-" I silenced him with a kiss and spread my legs wider for him, grasping at his back to guide him where I needed him. He pulled back, staring me dead in the eye, and I nodded. Not taking his eyes off mine, he pushed in slowly. I gasped as I felt him fill me, my walls stretching to accommodate his size. When he was all the way in he paused to let me adjust, and I could see the joke in his eyes before he even..

"Bigger than Spacewalker huh?" He smirked

"Shut up" I laughed, slapping his arm playfully. At that he pulled back slightly and rammed back in, leaving my mouth open in a silent cry. He smiled again, and I clawed at his back as he set a rhythm. Once it was steady I began meeting his thrusts, sending him deeper. He bent to take a nipple in his mouth, biting lightly, and I let out another cry. I tugged his hair roughly to bring his mouth to mine, and he groaned into my mouth, pulling back and catching my bottom lip between his teeth. He let his head fall beside mine, grunting with each thrust.

"Say my name" He demanded.

"Make me" I managed between gasps. I felt his hand slip down between up, rubbing hard on my clit.

"Say. My. Name." He accentuated each word with a hard thrust, hitting that spot every time. I screamed his name as I came, clenching and spasming around him, triggering his own orgasm. He collapsed on top of me, and we stayed like that till our breathing slowed. He rolled off, pulling me into his side. Chuckling, he kissed the top of my head.

"You should relax more often, Princess." Sighing my contentedness, I let out a small laugh of my own.

"You know, I think I just might."


	2. The Morning After

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I just felt like this needed a follow up, hope you guys like it as much as the first chapter. I think this is it for this story, but we'll see how it goes! Bellarke for life yo :') It might be slightly OOC but I tried my best.

I woke up in complete darkness, warm and.. naked? I sat up, confused, and tried to gather my thoughts. I felt something stir beside me, and the deep sigh brought it all back. Letting out a shaky breath I buried my face in my palms, not that I could see regardless. The distant sound of pounding and muffled cries suddenly became relevant as I could make out my name, and I realized Finn was probably losing his mind out there. How long had we slept? I stood up carefully, trying not to crash into anything and wake Bellamy up as I padded over to the far side of the bunker where the lantern lay. Feeling my way across the desk I found the match box and lantern, sparking the light again. As dim light flooded the room I rearranged the pen holder I'd knocked down, and returned to the bed. Not sure I wanted to acknowledge the boy outside just yet, I rested my head on my arm over Bellamy's chiseled chest, drawing his hair out of his face with a finger. He looked so much younger asleep, and all that tough facade he put on was nowhere in sight. I liked this Bellamy, the gentler one, the one afraid of death and who cared too much to be truly horrible. My brow furrowed as the weight of what had happened sunk down on me. The soft grin that spread across his face pulled me from my thoughts, and I smiled in spite of myself.

Nodding his head towards the corner, he opened one eye, asking a silent question at Finn's concerned voice still persisting outside the hatch. I let out an unladylike scoff at that and rolled off his chest and onto my back with a groan.

"As fun as it could be, we can't stay here forever. Scrapes to heal and a camp to lead Princess." he noted, hands behind his head. When I just lay there staring up at the ceiling he shot me a sideways glance. He gave me a light shove with his elbow, and I let a small smile slip again.

"Finn can wait." I said, and a little more bitterly, "I'm sure he can find other ways to occupy himself in the meantime." Noticing the edge in my voice he sat up a little, balancing his weight on one arm. Not wanting to talk about it, I turned onto my side, facing away from him. There was a moment of hesitation before he scooted over to press his body against my back, placing a kiss to my neck and trailing a finger from my shoulder down my arm, stopping to play with my fingers. Trying not to let it show how such a small gesture was affecting me, I stayed completely still.

"Well the sooner you get rid of him," he breathed in my ear, "the sooner you can come back to bed." Pausing only for a moment to shiver at the implied promise, I shot out of the bed. I gathered my clothes, dressing hastily while Bellamy leaned back and watched lazily, smiling to himself about something. I opened my mouth to ask, but just shook my head and ignored it. Muttering something about 'stupid Spacewalkers,' I made my way to the hatch. Sending one last hard look at the bed, I dragged the lock back and pushed open the hatch, climbing out into the blinding light.

"Clarke!" Finn breathed, relief flooding his features. Not meeting his eyes I stood with my arms folded across my chest, managing to keep my face expressionless. When I didn't say anything, he continued quickly, guilt dripping off every word.

"Look Clarke I- I never expected to see her again okay? I still wanted it to be you, and I care about you but I need t-" He cut off. "Whose shirt is that?" he asked, suspicious. I looked down, noticing for the first time the baggy way the cloth hung on me. I mentally cursed Bellamy; He'd let me put on his shirt, knowing it obviously looked out of character on me.

"Nice neck." he pointed. Confused for a moment I brought a hand up to stroke the flesh there before I realized how marked it must be. I flushed bright red as Finn's eyes shot back to the hatch, and before I could say anything he moved for it.

"It just-" I started to defend myself before I realized I had no reason to. He hadn't wanted me in the first place, that's how we'd ended up here. I moved out of the way so he could brush past me, and when he jumped down the hatch I gave him a few seconds to move out of the way before following him down. I was surprised to see Bellamy standing, wearing only his jeans and that cocky smirk. "I couldn't find my shirt anywhere, Princess." he teased, confirming that he definitely knew when I put it on. I shot him a half-hearted glare before Finn whirled back to me, an incredulous look on his face. He opened his mouth to speak, but I cut him off.

"Finn you have no right to be upset. You made a choice, and I made mine." Stepping aside from the ladder I continued. "I think you have someone who might be missing you. Better get on that." I tried to keep my voice cold and uncaring, and by the look on his face, I'd done alright. He stared at me for a few more seconds, and with a final glare at the smirking devil across the room, he stormed out of the bunker. I jumped a little at the sound of the door slamming shut, but let out the breath I wasn't aware I was holding. As my eyes locked with Bellamy's, I chewed my bottom lip, thinking. Misreading my silence, he tried to comfort me.

"He'll get over it."

"This was a mistake." I blurted. For barely a second, I saw a flash of pain in his eyes, before he masked it with his leader face, all weakness and vulnerability gone. Tossing me my own shirt he looked at me expectantly. As I realized what he was demanding, I blushed, and turned away, suddenly ashamed. I lifted his shirt off my body and slid my own on before turning back to throw his across the room. The cold Bellamy was back, the one that made the others tremble. I wanted to float myself for opening my stupid mouth, and I wished there were some way to take it back. He shrugged his shirt on, staring coldly as he stepped past me. Squeezing my eyes shut, i took a breath. Before he could climb to the ladder I turned, needing him to stay.

"Bellamy-" I began. He whirled so fast I barely had time to think, crashing his lips to mine hard. He pulled back, glaring down on me.

"Tell me again it was all just a mistake." He fumed, a mixture of rage and hurt in his tone. Speechless, I just stared at him, nothing coherent running through my mind. "You were there, she wasn't, and now she is. That's how it is Princess." He continued.

"Yeah I got that, thanks." I muttered, not needing him to spell it out for me. He just stared at me for a moment, tension so thick you could choke on it.

"No, Clarke, you don't got it. You-" He sighed, "Spacewalker has no idea what he gave up." The emotion in his voice made me look up at him, and I softened at the glimpse of gentler Bellamy spilling through. I wanted to stroke the hair out of his face, and the hurt, but he started speaking again.

"He can't have you." When I opened my mouth to protest he took a sure step forwards, a possessive tone in his voice. "When he comes crawling back because she won't put up with his mixed feelings, he'll have to pry you from my bed." my tongue flicked out to lick my lips, and his eyes darted to watch the motion. The tension shifted, and suddenly my legs refused to work. As he moved in closer my brain screamed at me, and I managed a small stumble backwards before his hands shot out, dragging me roughly against him. Staring down at me intensely, he waited for me to say something. When nothing came out, he dipped his head. Just before his lips touched mine my mouth began to move.

"I was just drunk, and hurt." I blurted. I swallowed hard, finishing off with, "I was vulnerable." I nodded, furrowing my brow as I tried to focus. He chuckled, and bent his head again as though he hadn't really heard me.

"So what's your excuse now." He challenged against my lips.

"Still vulnerable?" I whispered. I'm not sure who moved first, but the kiss was hard as we grasped for each other, pulling and arching like we needed the contact. I clutched at his shirt, lifting it off his head and crashing our lips together hungrily. He tugged mine off, backing me towards the bed. As he pulled me flush against him I felt like I was burning up, needing to be naked, closer, needing him everywhere all at once. I pushed down at his jeans, and as his hands left my waist I reached for my own, both working out of our pants with frenzied desire. We lunged back for each other, tongues dancing, teeth biting. I let out a moan as I felt his erection, our underwear the only barrier. Pushing me back onto the bed, he gazed down intensely before lowering himself onto me. I immediately reached out to touch him, needing to feel him, memorize his every ripple, but he grabbed my wrists. Smirking mischievously at me, he raised my wrists above my head, pinning me down with his body. Kissing a trail across my jaw to suck the spot under my ear, he held both my wrists with one hand, leaving the other free to tease a burning trail down my ribs.

"This," he breathed, "Is what vulnerable feels like, Princess." I let out a strangled cry as his hand traveled to the edge of my underwear, only to pull back just before dipping his fingers inside. I struggled against his hands, but he didn't budge. He let out a dark laugh, and I shuddered.

"Bellamy, stop teasing" I gasped. "Not this time." He continued drawing agonizingly slow circles against my pelvis while his mouth found the spot under my ear again.

"You mean next time." He chuckled. Frustrated, I tried to arch my hips, chasing his hands.

"That's not what I meant." I struggled again, breathless and needing.

"Say you're mine." He demanded, dragging his fingers over slightly, oh so slowly nearing my core.

"Bellamy!" I pleaded. He pulled back to look at me, the challenge in his eyes. My breath hitched as a finger ghosted over my clit through the fabric. Refusing to be manipulated, I set my jaw and shook my head stubbornly. The tiniest flicker of a smile threatened the corner of his lips, and I knew it was game on.

"No?" He drawled. I spread my legs, his hips dipping more intimately against mine, but not quite where I needed them. I wiggled my hips a little, testing, and he bit back a groan. Staring up into his eyes, I dragged my tongue across my lower lip, his eyes again following the motion. I gave a smirk of my own at the slight victory. Remembering he was supposed to be the one teasing me, he resumed trailing his fingers. He began kissing down my collarbone, leaving a wet trail and small marks as he went. He reached his other hand up and again took a wrist in each palm. As he continued his path down, he pinned my hands down by my sides, his mouth playing at my belly button. He breathed a hot trail straight to my aching center, and I arched. Looking up at me, he took the fabric between his teeth, tugging them down my legs. Kicking them the rest of the way off, he kissed his way back up my thigh. Biting my lip to hold back my moan, I tested my wrists again.

"Ah ah ah." He mused. He continued working his mouth up my thighs, slow and in control. When he finally reached my center I let out a choked cry, not expecting his mouth to clamp over my slit. Fucking me with his tongue, he released my hands to hold down my bucking hips. Knotting my hands in his hair I felt the tension growing inside my body. He licked his way up, tasting every bit of me before flicking roughly at my engorged bud. I jerked, a low sounds slipping from my throat. He expertly worked my body, tongue plucking all the right spots as I whimpered helplessly.

"God Bellamy I- I'm so close!" He moaned around me, and built me higher and higher and then-

I let out a frustrated cry as he pulled back, keeping me just on the edge but not quite there. I started making tortured noises, begging for that release, but he still held back.

"Say that you're mine." He demanded again. Nodding my head and tugging his hair I let out another frustrated noise.

"I'm yours!" I whimpered. "Louder." He gasped. I screamed it out as he attacked me with his tongue, sending me into oblivion as I came hard, calling his name as I saw white. He kept sucking and nipping at me until I made a noise, jerking away from his relentless tongue. It was minutes before I could compose myself, and he crawled up beside me, stroking the hair from my face as I panted. I turned to find him gazing at my face tenderly, trailing his eyes to my lips before he looked up to meet my stare.

"Say it again." He whispered.

"I'm yours" I whispered back, meaning it. He pulled me close, kissing me gently. Wanting to return the favor, I rolled on top of him, straddling his waist. Without pulling our lips apart I used his shirt to bring him to a sitting position. I rolled my hips down into him, swallowing his grunt in my mouth. Wrapping his arms around my back he tugged me closer. I began kissing my way along his jaw, sucking at his neck, nipping at the skin there. He unhooked my bra, palming the flesh there and I let out a soft moan. He laughed a little, and I pulled back to look at his face. He guided me off a little more, and I made to protest before I realized he was just slipping his boxers down. After he'd lost them he reached for me, pulling me back onto his lap. Sitting up on my knees, I felt him position himself. I kissed him again as I lowered myself onto his hard member, his choked gasp vibrating through me. Shyly, I rocked my hips a little, testing. Sensing my hesitation, he guided my hips up a bit before slamming them back down. Gasping in unison, he did it again. Then again, and again, until I began doing it on my own, setting a hard pace. I ground my hips against him, hitting a spot that almost threw off my rhythm. As his breathing grew labored and he began meeting my thrusts I knew he was close. He tossed his head back, and I kissed at his neck. Throwing a hand between us he began working fast circles on my clit, and I bit into his shoulder. It sent him over, and he called out my name as he spilled inside me. Coming down from my own orgasm, I rolled off him, both of us hitting the bed breathlessly. We looked over at each other at the same time, and I pulled myself to him, letting my hands idly stroke circles on his chest. Drawing patterns, I nuzzled into his arms, and he placed a kiss to my head before resting his cheek against it.

"Bellamy Blake, I am so yours." I laughed, letting my eyes drift closed.


	3. Camp

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Okay loves, you've got me. My one shot will blossom into a story, and as much as I love the smut I'm going to tone it down for at least a little while so I can develop that possessive/gentle Bellarke we all love, and loosely follow the plot of the show. Keep the reviews coming guys, I really appreciate them and take them all to heart. I love hearing where you guys would like this to go too.
> 
> This chapter will be brief, mostly because I kind of want to see ep 7 before I go too much deeper, but I wanted to let you know there will be more to come! Okay, let's begin *sobs delightedly*

It had been three days since our return to camp, and neither Finn nor Octavia had spoken to either of us. Raven had demanded an explanation from Finn, who was furious when he'd arrived back at camp. Soon, Octavia was bombarded as well by the boys who played guard asking if she knew her brother's whereabouts, and she'd also harassed Finn into spilling the story. Just like that, the news spread throughout camp until everyone knew, information and fact turning to stretched truths and outrageous gossip in the two days we'd been gone. I spent more and more time in the shuttle, away from the eyes that seemed to follow me wherever I went, and more importantly, one Bellamy Blake. I didn't really have to do much hiding, he was busy containing the chaos that nearly swept over camp and putting on his leader face to remind them all he was in charge. I knew it was only a matter of time before I had to face him, but for now I was content to hide away in the dim room, occasionally sterilizing cuts and burns.

The sound of boots scaling the ladder drew my attention away from the pile of seaweed I was crushing in to powder, and a genuine smile splashed over my face as Jasper's head poked up. He and Monty had shrugged off the situation, impartial to it all; Monty was content with his wires and Jasper more than happy with Octavia. They made sure I always had the supplies I needed, and kept me in tuned to everything going on outside.

"How goes it, Doc?" He asked cheerily, glancing over her shoulder at the pile of sea dust.

"I am just living the dream Jasp." I groaned, stretching out my cramped knuckles. He laughed, and I smiled back.

"Lucky for you, It's time for your lunch break." He announced, pretending to check his imaginary watch. He pulled two sticks from behind his back, each with a chunk of cooked meat skewered on the end. Wiping my hands of the dust on my jeans, I reached out for a stick. He playfully waved it out of my reach, and I raised a brow at him.

"Seeing as you started treating me like a slave since you're mysterious disappearance, I'd say I deserve both rations." he joked, easily pulling it from my reach each time I dived for it. I scoffed at him, and all but climbed up his arm when he held it above his head. This time, he let me get it, and we sat against the makeshift medical table to eat our meal. After a few bites, Monty's face popped up through the hatch, his own skewer in hand. He looked to Jasper, lopsided smile playing at his lips.

"Thought I smelled you." He teased. Making his way to sit crossed-legged in front of us.

"Ha-ha!" Jasper chimed, kicking at him lightly. I sat back contentedly, listening to the boys back-and-forth bantering, laughing along while we ate. After a few comfortable moments of quiet eating, Jasper began the daily routine of filling me in on camp news.

"So a few guys got into a fight and pulled their knives on each other, and when Bellamy found out he made a new rule-" he was cut off briefly by Monty's interjection.

"Mmm!" He hummed around a mouthful of food. Swallowing quickly, he threw in, "a new suggestion." with a snicker. I rolled my eyes to that as Jasper continued.

"He made a new suggestion that if anyone was caught using their weapons on someone in camp they'd spend the rest of that day and the next tied to the tree." he finished, matter-of-factly. They told her a few more stories, like the kids who were lighting each other on fire as some game, and the girl who thinks she's pregnant before Jasper stood up, taking the sticks to return for next meal and wiping his hands on his pants.

"I'm going to see the butterflies with 'Tavia." He said, somewhat shyly. Monty made a whipping noise as he lashed his wrist quickly, but shot him a light smile. Jasper just shook his head and stalked out, jumping down the hatch. Monty stretched his arms above his head before standing up too.

"Raven wants my help fixing the wires for the radio.." he muttered, unsure. I nodded my head with a small smile as I stood up and began arranging the tools on the table.

"Go," I said. "I've got plenty to do around here." He hesitated for a moment before making up his mind and beaming at me. He climbed down the hatch, and I was left alone in the shuttle. I winced at the stalk of seaweed that still needed to be ground, and dived in. I'd managed to do a good deal of it before more footsteps sounded at the ladder. Figuring it was Jasper coming back early, I didn't bother turning around. After a moment of silence I was about to turn around, only to be shocked frozen by a familiar, yet unexpected voice.

"We should talk." Finn stated slowly. It took me a few seconds to process.

"What's there to talk about?" I managed, still not turning.

"Clarke.." It was almost a whisper, and I held my breath. "About us."

"There is no us Finn" I said finally turning to him, hating the way my heart ached. "You've got a girlfriend, I've got-"

"You've got what , Bellamy?" He accused. " Newsflash for you, so has every other girl at this camp."

"Well things change, you should know that." I glared at him, implying the obvious. Guilt dripped over his face, and he moved a little closer.

"Look, I care about her," he stated. "but I thought it was the end of that life, and what we had... what we have is something I'm not ready to put behind me yet."

"Well you're just going to have to." I said, turning to put some distance between us. His hand shot to my wrist, stopping me. He pulled me to look at him.

"And I don't think you are either." He searched my eyes, his face and voice gentle, but sure. We stood like that for a while, just staring at each other as I tried to gather my thoughts. Shaking my head, I tugged my wrist away.

"You should go, Finn." I said softly, turning back to the table. He opened his mouth to say something, but was cut off by a deeper, stronger voice.

"Clear out, Spacewalker." I turned to see Bellamy staring at me intensely in front of the hatch before his eyes locked on Finn's. I almost rolled my eyes at the way they both seemed to straighten their shoulders, trying to appear as more than two boys fighting over turf. Losing the silent battle, Finn stalked out, practically bumping Bellamy out of his way. Waiting just a minute after he was gone, Bellamy finally set his focus on me again. My luck, it seems, has ran out.


	4. The Walls Are Caving In

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: *Crawls from deep dark cave, gnarled and bashful* hey peeps! Remember this story from 2014? Because I sure didn't. Anyways, now that season 5 has come out and the unresolved Bellarke tension is still eating away at our wills to live, I figured I'd continue this little ditty here. Sorry if it dissapoints, I'm still trying to recreate this headspace I was in when I was watching this all for the first time. Sorry for the wait my Lovelies!

It felt like eons, the way the silence stretched out between us. He had his honey brown eyes fixated on my face, searching for answers I didn't have. With a huffed sigh I straightened my spine, alluding to a much more put together version of myself.

"Bellamy," I mumbled curtly, hating the slightly breathy quality it took on of its own accord.

"Clarke."

"Need something," I queried, urging my tone into as nonchalant a sound I could. He snorted, shaking the beautiful shaggy locks on his head side to side.

"I want to know why you've been hiding in this damn tin can. We sorta need you out there, Princess."

And what could I say? That I couldn't face the stares? That seeing Raven and Finn killed me, and that running into Bellamy was nearly as gutwrenching as the glares from his harem? Spacewalker may be a prick, but he was right about one thing; I was definitely not first in a grand number of girls who had been had by Bellamy Blake. What's worse is that I hadn't even waited an entire day after losing Finn to jump into bed with somebody else. How could I face the world when I couldn't even face myself?

"I've been busy, pummeling seaweed and.. such." I shrugged, though an excuse had never sounded so pathetic.

"Yeah? Well so have I," he spat. "Running this whole freakin camp, remember?"

And if looks could kill, I'd have met my end right there in the shuttle, crushed under the heavy weight behind his gaze. I heaved a sigh, defeat plastered thick on my lead bones. "What do you want me to say?" I threw my arms up wide in frustration.

"I want you to talk to me," he pleaded in his low, gruff voice. And God, I wished I could. But I'd already been burned to a crisp, and if he thought he deserved to be under my skin and in my head he could float himself. It had been days, and it's not like he'd come knocking for a chat either, until now. Maybe I was just another number in the dust below his tent.

"I just can't, Bellamy," I whispered. "Okay?" All the bravado seemed to melt from his shoulders as he closed the distance between us in a few strides.

"You've got to," he murmured gently, a smile creeping over his lips. "How else am I supposed to keep these idiots in line without your Royal Highness?"

I barked out a laugh. It was as good as him admitting he needed me, and my hearththrummed lightly behind my ribs for the first time in what felt like ages. He drew me tight into his chest, wrapping his warmth and strength around me. For just a minute none of it mattered; not my mother's betrayal, or Finn's. Not the ninety-something kids we were suddenly left in charge of, or the ticking clock on the three hundred lives that would be ended on the Ark if Raven couldn't fix that damn radio. For a split second, it was the furthest thing from my mind. But yet, as I leaned up on my tippy-toes to press my lips to his, it all seemed to come crashing back down tenfold.

"You ever feel like the weight of the world is literally on your shoulders?" I groaned, resting my forehead on his chest.

"All the time," he whispered, his tone far off and wistful. The world slipped away, our existence stripping down to his arms on my back and my breath soaking through the fabric over his heart. "You said you were mine and then you left me alone."

The tangible longing in his hushed, barely audible plea whiddled it's way through my veins, clawing guiltily at my heartstrings. I'd been so caught up in my own head that I hadn't even thought about the good things to come from the horror show. It was a good thing... Right?

My lips parted, but the apologies were swallowed by the clanging of boots on the ladder. A frazzled Jasper poked up, panic so clear in his eyes I could almost hear his frantic pulse.

"Have you guys seen Octavia?" The words tumbled from his mouth in a rush, and Bellamy pulled away with a frown.

"You were supposed to be keeping an eye on her," his tone was cold and accusing. I read the tension in his brow like an old novel, remembering how harsh she'd been on him since he destroyed the radio. Finding out he'd shot the Chancellor was something she still hadn't forgiven him for, even though Jaha had survived it, and his intentions were born of love for his sister.

"Have you searched the whole camp," I interjected; it would do nobody any good, especially not Octavia, to play the blame game right now. Jasper nodded earnestly, tears burning hot behind his pupils. "She's probably just wandering in the woods. Gather a search party, Bellamy's orders."

He jumped back down the hatch, picking delinquents who knew the area best. I grabbed Bellamy by the hand, giving a firm squeeze for reassurance.

"Hey," I said, patting his shoulder. "We'll find her."

And as we made our way out of camp, leading side by side, I pretended not to notice the judging, slack jaws of a hundred gawking teenagers.


	5. Searching

We split into groups of six, one heading north the other heading south. We'd work our way as far out as we could before reaching grounder territory, and then make our way East as the other group searched west. By sundown we were to tread the perimeter and meet at the creek, and then decide from there. We scouted along, Finn, Miller, Harper, Jasper, Bellamy and myself mostly in silence, thought didn't take long for Finn to pull me aside. With a grim scowl I let him slow our pace until we fell just shy of earshot.

"Hey, can we just talk about this?" He motioned two fingers over the empty space between our bodies and I had to physically hold back an eye roll. I trudged on offering him no reprieve. Maybe it was the guilt that led him to keep pursuing, or maybe he really was just oblivious. "You're angry."

"You're observant," I deadpanned. His voice was urgent and pleading, groping for any shred of sympathy.

"Look, I know that I messed up Clarke.. I should ha-"

"Have told me about her," I cut him off crossly. "I know; you keep saying it, but that doesn't change the fact that you didn't. You didn't say anything." Tears welled up behind my pupils, burning behind my skull despite the teeth digging into the inner walls of my cheeks. As they threatened to spill hot little trails down my flushed chin I let the anger overcome me instead. I thought of Wells, and my mother. I thought of everyone who had ever lied, and all that had come of it. I wished the anguish on the people who had sent one hundred kids to die, wanted to float them for making me responsible over who survives, over all that was left of humanity. Over these choices. And I wished I had never met Spacewalker. He palmed at my shoulders, forcing me to a halt and fixed his shining hazel irises at me head on. And I cursed the Earth as I felt a rush through my veins, an ache to go back to how things were before. As much as he'd broken my heart there was a piece of me that belonged to him; a small shard of soul that always would.

"I'm not doing this now, Finn," I mumbled, shrugging off his fingers with a tad more force than necessary.

"Then when? Clarke!" He called after me as he threw up his arms in frustration, the thunder in his throat drawing the attention of several eavesdropping ears. Just then, Bellamy's stern face appeared through the brush and nodded me over. My feet all but ran to him, escaping the conversation I'd been dreading since the moment it became essential.

"Looked like you could use some rescuing," he drawled, his voice low as he leaned in close. I slanted a tiny but genuine smile as thanks, and I thanked my lucky star for dropping him into my life, at least.  
.......

 

Eventually the sun dipped low through the trees, providing us only enough light to see our feet gliding almost aimlessly over the brush. We'd searched the woods fruitlessly for hours, but it was getting dark. Still, nobody wanted to be the first to mention heading back in fear of the definite resulting black eye. For me, at least, some small part relished the tiny adventure. I was thriving off the feel of stretching my travel-starved limbs and escaping the endless onslaught of haunting memories, regardless of how my entire body screeched in protest. If the cause wasn't so dire, as it always seemed to be here on this planet, I might actually admit I was enjoying myself. And my god, was it ever beautiful.  
As we drew near the small, steady flowing creek I watched the pensive rut between Bellamy's dark brows crease further. There was only so far and so long we could search, even he knew that, but...  
He couldn't leave her; not his sister. No matter how furious she was with him, or how many insults and snarky comments she threw his way he knew she loved him. He'd do anything to protect her, anyone could see that, although none of us ever really understood. The sibling relationship was the most confusing of all, some strange, foreign puzzle. On the Ark there were no cousins, or aunts and uncles like we read about in books or saw on old DVDs. Sure there were grandparents, and parents, and a baby; but nobody had a sibling. Except.. Bellamy did, and he looked out for her more than he looked out for himself. I stole a glance nicer my shoulder at Finn, and realized I couldn't imagine what it would be like to love someone so wholly.  
The light was quickly fading to black, and if we had any hope of finding Octavia it'd have to be soon. A strikingly white swirl of paint lined the trees ahead, drawing my full attention and marking the forbidden pathway into grounder territory. Though no sign of their watchful, predatory eyes gleamed forth it was certain they were there. They were everywhere, weren't they?

"Bellamy," I warned. He grunted in response, hardly sparing a glance in my direction. His voice was low and restrained, barely wedging through his pearly clenched teeth.

"She's nowhere out here, Clarke. We both know there's only one explanation."

"Bellamy, we don't know that." The stubborn tick of his jaw set my blood to boil, a slow cooking rage against my icy and ever-growing exasperation. "I'm not going to let you get us all killed."

"You're right," he conceded coldly as he whirled on me. I felt brief relief until he opened his mouth once more. "Take everybody back to camp. I'll go alone," he roared. I held his gaze refusing to be intimidated, and we battled silently long enough for an audience to gather cautiously. A sharp tick of snapping twigs brokr the spell and had every head whipped towards the sound, heels pivoted into a fight or flight stance. When the cheery faces of the other half of our search party peeked into view, a collective exhale swept over six pairs of lungs that hadn't even realized they'd been holding in air.

"Find anything?" Bellamy boomed, a tiny sliver of hope daring to creep over his voice. A lithe boy with a mop of shaggy blonde hair gave a dissapointed nod and Bellamy glared onto the treeline, clamping his teeth hard together. He cocked his head to the side, as though to say:  
'You know I'm right, are you coming or not?'  
And just like that the decision was set in stone within his mind, but I couldn't accept it. We both straightened our spines defiantly, fighting for any shred of give the other might let slide. I sensed rather than saw Finn protectively at my side as Bellamy loomed over me.

"Clarke, you're not going with him," Finn exclaimed incredulously. I ignored him, which only seemed to frustrate him further.

"Miller, get everyone back to camp," I ordered, eyes never leaving the furious mocha orbs burning down on me. Confusion and uncertainty swept over the group, and I boomed a sharp "NOW," for good measure. They shuffled away as a herd, Finn straggling behind a moment with distrust and a challenge in his stony glare.  
Bellamy's chest heaved under the weight of his worry and his pride until it was just us two in the woods. What was it he was always mumbling under his breath?

'His sister, his responsibility?'

"Don't be stupid, Clarke," he dared.

"You're one to talk. What's the plan then," I cried, frustration dripping in thick pools off each syllable. "Run in there, demand to know where they're keeping her and hope nobody cuts off your head?"  
He stiffened, raising his gaze to the trees with a youthful stubbornness. "You'd be lucky to make it five feet."

"She's out here because of me," he croaked. The guilt dripped off his tongue, coating every inch of his posture in defeated agony. 

"We'll find her Bellamy, I promise. But not today. Look, you always did what you had to do to protect your sister right? Well right now Octavia needs you back at camp resting up and making an actual plan. THAT'S how we save her." I worried my lip hard between my teeth, hoping that the words reached past his ears. He gave a tiny nod as I squeezed his forearm reassuringly, and we turned to head back to camp.

His warm hand wrapped around my wrist, tugging me back and into his chest. Fingertips traced the edges of my jawline tenderly as he pressed our lips together. It was rough and needy, and I kissed him back as best I could. Bellamy pulled back just enough to rest his forehead against mine, as he whispered:

"If anything happens to her, it's on me Princess." And then his body was gone as he headed back, always keeping a few paces ahead of me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, I'm really struggling to write this, and I don't know if I will continue it. I'm just not in the same mindset as when I started it, and I can't find the track I originally wanted to go on. Thanks for sticking by me all this time!!


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